Do you ever find yourself losing control in angry outbursts? Perhaps you get angry in traffic or in a stressful domestic situation? Do you ever feel surprised by just how angry you get sometimes? Or if the cause of the anger was something trivial?
Well, everyone gets angry from time to time, that’s normal, but if you feel out of control or violent then it’s time to take a look at what is causing it.
It’s important to learn how to deal with it in a productive way.
Uncontrolled anger can seriously harm your life and is dangerous to your health.
What is anger management?
Anger or a sudden bursts of anger are often a result of frustration or blocked feelings.
Anger management is a goal orientated psychotherapeutic strategy for anger prevention and control.
It looks at all the internal and external factors that cause anger. It can also be described as learning to use anger constructively.
Anger management programs
It’s extremely useful to have a professional analyse your behaviour from an impartial perspective.
They can then guide you with taking corrective measures. Therapy is needed to change your thinking and behaviour but most importantly, to safely look at the root or the anger and to treat it.
What causes anger?
Anger is caused by either internal or external factors.
Internal factors are thought patterns that the individual “perceives” to be failures, injustices or other negative effects. Therapy can help you learn to take control of these thoughts and use them constructively.
External factors are events caused by other people, places or things which are outside of the individuals control. Learning what is within a person’s control is the first step in dealing with external causes of anger.
Anger management programs and anger management therapy helps the individual to learn how to “let go” of those things outside of their control. It’s those impossible burdens we take on unknowingly that often weigh us down.
Anger management also helps the individual focus on those things they can actively control and change in their lives, including their perspective of the world around them.
Individually therapy & group t
Anger management therapy focuses on helping the client get over an emotional block. The objective of the therapy is to help the individual learn what their emotional stressors are, and especially to learn to recognise the intense emotional stressors that cause anger.
Think of it as taking an emotional inventory. As you can see, learning about your emotional state is the first phrase in this strategy.
Individual therapy is an opportunity to discuss personal issues and to develop personal strategies for dealing with anger.
Group therapy is an opportunity to learn from other people, see how they feel and respond to their anger. Sometimes we understand the theory but not the practice in real life.
In group therapy, by relating to others with similar emotional responses, we can see how they have made progress, where they struggle and importantly, to know that you are not the only person with anger management problems.
The goals of therapy are:
- To correctly identify what emotion they are feeling (sounds easy but this can sometimes be confused)
- To express emotions, feelings and needs in an appropriate way
- To identify situations that could trigger outbursts so they can prepare for it
- To recognise when they are not thinking logically and to know what to do when that happens
- To retrain your reactions to focus on problem-solving rather than focus on the problem
Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.– Rumi
How to I identify anger problems or anger issues?
Many people have asked themselves “Do I need anger management?”, followed quickly by another question “How to tell if you have anger issues?”.
Taking a quick self-survey can help to qualify your thoughts on this.
Try the anger management test below:
Anger management test
Answer the following questions true or false
1. I “bottle-up” my anger and don’t show it with everything that makes me mad, but when I get angry – look out!?
2. I get angry when I remember the past, especially when other people did something to me.?
3. Sometimes I get angry over trivial things?
4. I get angry when waiting in line, in a queue, or waiting for other people?
5. Sometimes I have difficulty sleeping because I think about what has upset me recently?
6. I find it very hard to forgive those who have done me wrong?
7. I get angry with myself when I lose control of my motions?
8. I get very anger when people I have trusted let me down?
9. When things don’t go the way I had wanted or planned, I get depressed?.
10. I have had problems at work because of my anger or temper?.
11. I have become physically violent, breaking things or hurt other people?.
12. After an argument with someone, I can’t remember what I have said?
13. I have felt very depressed, alone and have thought about suicide?
14. I abuse alcohol, drugs, or other addictive substances?
15. Other people are afraid of my temper and have told me?
16. When angry, I say things that I regret later?
If you have answered “yes” to the majority of these questions then you could have anger management issues.
Talking to a qualified therapist will help you to confirm, accept and move forward with therapy.
Camino Recovery is a private drug and alcohol rehabilitation centre located on the Andalucian Coast in Spain. Please contact us for more information or if you need a confidential and free chat with one of our highly-trained professionals.
Sometimes the hardest step is reaching out for help but it’s also the most important.