Whether you’re relatively new to recovery or you’ve achieved long-term sobriety, the holidays might feel challenging rather than exciting.
When you combine sobriety with a country like Spain, which has a rich history and culture of drinking, things could seem daunting indeed.
Going away on a holiday can be difficult to handle in the early days of recovery. Travelling and being away from familiar surroundings and your support system might put you in stressful situations where you have a hard time resisting or saying no. Maybe you’re worried about going to a party with others drinking or anxious about what people think if you don’t join in the drinking.
These are valid concerns, but with some preparation and a solid plan, you can thrive during the Spanish holiday season while having fun AND maintaining your hard-earned sobriety.
If you’re ready for a celebration-filled, sober festive season—read on!
Understanding Spain’s drinking culture
To understand how to maintain sobriety during the festive season, let’s first take a look at the drinking culture in Spain and how it differs from what you might expect.
The drinking culture in Spain is much more casual and relaxed than in other parts of the world. Drinking is a significant part of social life, but it’s more about being together, catching up, laughing and having fun rather than binge drinking. Spaniards are very relaxed “social drinkers” who focus more on enjoying the moment. This cultural approach means everyone can hang out together and enjoy each other without feeling pressured to drink.
In Spain, the social custom is to gather over drinks of all kinds, not just alcoholic beverages. There are few differences between restaurants, cafes, and bars—they are all quite similar—so you might have a bit harder time completely avoiding ‘bars’ here. The majority of places are more of a ‘sit and chill with a drink and some tapas (snacks)’ sort of place. This type of flexibility makes it very easy to find somewhere that you feel comfortable!
Typically, when you order something, the waiter will ask, “Y para beber?” (“and to drink?”), and then you can order whatever you want. You might be surprised to know that alcohol-free beer (“cerveza sin alcohol,” commonly labelled “SIN”) is very popular here and available in nearly every establishment.
Additionally, a wide variety of other non-alcoholic (NA) drinks are available in bars, such as:
- Nestea
- Aquarius
- Soft drinks (refrescos)
- Sparkling water (agua con gas)
- Coffee (café)
- Hot tea (té caliente)
Depending on which region of Spain you’re in, cold drinks might be served with tapas, which helps maintain the social aspect without the alcohol. With so many options, you’ll never feel out of place while enjoying the festive atmosphere.
Handling Spanish social settings while sober
In Spain, it’s socially acceptable to drink or not to drink! The point is companionship and conversation. Most Spaniards won’t pressure you to drink alcohol or question your choice of beverage; it’s simply not an issue. No one is judging you.
If you feel comfortable doing so, you can be upfront and clear with servers that you won’t be drinking to avoid repeated offers of alcoholic drinks. Responses like “no me apetece” (I don’t feel like it) are typically sufficient if asked.
It’s not so much about what you’re drinking as it is about being present and going out socially. If you’re cool with going to bars and social events with alcohol, nearly everyone there will be much more concerned with what they’re drinking than what you are. Like anywhere, it’s possible you might meet someone who asks a lot of questions or is bothered by it. But that’s a them thing, not a you thing. Your decision to stay sober is valid and worth protecting. So sit back, enjoy the tapas, and order what you’re comfortable with.
Navigating sobriety during family holidays
In Spain, family plays a significant role in celebrations. Whether you’re here alone, with a Spanish family or with your own family, the weeks of celebrations usually revolve around family get-togethers, both in the home and outside. As mentioned, in most families, alcohol is a huge part of Spanish culture, and you might see people drinking wine and beer at all times of the day, including for breakfast with some of the older generation. If you’re dealing with family members and their drinking, it’s going to be essential to set boundaries. For example, it is absolutely acceptable to politely decline a drink from a family member—the most important thing is to protect your sobriety.
If you’re in early recovery or are easily triggered or overwhelmed in social situations, you’ll need to have a plan to navigate family traditions that might involve alcohol—and many of them do. With a bit of advanced prep, you can learn the necessary coping skills and manage your emotional reactions in advance.
Here are four top tips to help navigate sobriety during your family holiday:
- Create a strong support system. Have a sober friend, sponsor, or supportive friend lined up and ready to answer the phone. Better yet, bring them with you!
- Know your exit strategy and be ready to execute it. This can be as simple as “Thanks for the party; I need to go now.” There’s no need to complicate things. You can also simply decline any invitation that feels uncomfortable to you—no guilt! Temptations are everywhere, so avoid going into situations unprepared; have an exit strategy to manage potential triggers.
- Be proactive and make a plan to manage any challenging situations or topics. This could be a virtual plan, like doing 12-step meetings via Zoom. COVID opened the path to some excellent virtual resources. Plus, there are wonderful small newcomer group meetings (AA, SMART recovery, etc.), forums, and international groups, like this AA Meeting Directory for Spain.
- Above all, prioritise and take care of yourself. Before walking into any family situation, maybe try some meditation and a gratitude list (Why I’m thankful to be sober…). Or it could be setting a healthy boundary and simply saying no altogether. You don’t have to go to every outing or get-together; it’s much more important to look after yourself and your sobriety. Remember why you got sober and keep that reason alive as motivation.
Create and celebrate new alcohol-free traditions
There’s so much to do in Spain you don’t need to be tempted by drinking! It’s easy to embrace local Spanish culture without alcohol.
During the festive season in Spain, celebrations are everywhere, from the smallest villages to the largest cities. You’ll find everyone out and about enjoying holiday markets, local festivals, concerts, ice skating, or watching the Three Kings Day parades.
If you’ve had enough of the festive theme, get out and explore! Spain has 50 UNESCO World Heritage sites for you to discover. Dig into the local cuisine by indulging yourself on a food tour, marvel at centuries-old castles and cathedrals, take a road trip exploring the coastline, or stretch your legs while you hike the country’s amazing trails.
Finding strength and support during the holidays with Camino Recovery
This holiday season, give yourself grace and recognise all your hard work by prioritising your health, happiness, and a fulfilling, sober future.
No matter where you are in your recovery journey, staying sober is no small feat. Sobriety takes courage, strength and commitment! Navigating stressful holiday triggers can be incredibly challenging, especially in a country like Spain, where casual drinking can seem pervasive.
The holiday season has a way of bringing up old memories, buried emotions, and all sorts of tough family issues. Be kind to yourself, and allow yourself to feel however you feel. However, if you’re finding the holiday season overwhelming or need additional support, Camino Recovery is here to help.
Our expert team is ready to show you how to have a holiday season filled with sobriety and celebration! We offer individualised treatment programmes, family intervention and family workshops to guide you through challenges and strengthen your recovery. Reach out today, and let us support you in creating a joyful, sober holiday season.
