In recovery circles, addiction is recognised as a family disease.
Yet, the families and loved ones of those struggling with addiction often feel helpless, unsupported, and at a complete loss when it comes to helping the person they care about.
Some families stay quiet, hoping the problem will resolve itself.
This is not because they don’t care, but because they simply have no clue how to approach the situation, at least not without worrying they will make things worse for their loved one.
Conversely, other families go down the intervention route – hoping that confronting their loved one’s addiction issues head-on will help them get the treatment and care they need more quickly.
The truth is, we cannot force someone into sobriety.
Ultimately, it is a decision for the individual and one that requires a lot of dedication, courage, and the capacity to explore what may have caused their addiction in the first place.
All very confronting stuff.
If you are concerned about your loved one’s drinking or drug-taking patterns, it’s likely you’ve wondered what may have caused your loved one to become addicted in the first place.
Understanding the root cause of addiction
So many factors are considered when it comes to understanding the root cause of addiction.
There’s genetics. Personal lifestyle choices. Environmental factors like workplace pressure or interpersonal relationship issues.
Cultural influences – what type of friends does the individual have? How does their job influence their patterns of drinking or drug-taking?
And then, there’s trauma, which researchers have identified as one of the primary causes of all addiction, whether it’s substance abuse or process addictions like gambling or gaming.
Here, we will focus on helping you understand the role of childhood trauma in a loved one’s addiction, including some helpful resources that can provide support and guidance.
Witnessing a loved one’s addiction can be incredibly isolating and, at times, traumatising.
Families are often the invisible casualties – those who don’t always get the help and support they deserve.
Rest assured, we understand the many challenges families face when a loved one is grappling with addiction – helplessness, fear, constant worry, and self-blame, to name just a few.
But you are not alone.
As well as your loved one, you can also get help and support, and the team at Camino Recovery is here to guide you through this incredibly tough time.
Understanding the role of childhood trauma in a loved one’s addiction
Studies show that childhood trauma can impact individuals in many different ways. These impacts are dependent on various factors such as the type and length of the trauma, the child’s age when it occurred, their genetic make-up, gender, and whether they had a caring and supportive adult present (De Bellis & Zisk, 2014; Levin et al., 2021; Nakazawa, 2015).
Chronic or repeated stress resulting from continuous childhood trauma (such as exposure to domestic abuse) can exacerbate the dysregulation of the nervous system. For instance, the HPA axis becomes chronically activated, leading to elevated stress hormones and hyperarousal (Nakazawa, 2015). Children who experience chronic trauma or stress in their early years are more prone to experiencing anxiety and chronic hypervigilance compared to children without such histories.
These outcomes are often carried into adulthood, where the individual uses substances to cope with unresolved trauma symptoms.
Addiction is a symptom of a much deeper issue
What many families don’t realise is that addiction isn’t just about the substance or behaviour – it is often, if not almost always, deeply rooted in past pain, especially unresolved childhood trauma.
What we know is that addiction is a symptom of a much more profound, underlying problem.
Whether the individual experienced abuse, emotional neglect or grew up in an unstable, unpredictable environment, these early traumatic experiences can leave a lasting imprint that continues into adulthood.
At Camino Recovery, we help individuals overcome addiction through a range of different therapies and techniques, enabling them to not only manage their symptoms but also reprocess painful experiences that may cause or worsen their addiction.
Treatments such as talk therapy, family support, and alcohol addiction treatment alongside trauma-informed therapies like EMDR (eye movement desensitisation reprocessing) offer individuals and their families a comprehensive, holistic approach to recovery that treats the whole person and not just a set of symptoms, leading to lasting change.
Speak to a team member today.
How trauma shows up in later life
Unresolved childhood wounds often reveal themselves through a series of symptoms or behaviours, such as emotional dysregulation, low self-worth, or an inability to cope with life.
Trauma survivors often use substances and other destructive behaviours to mask their pain – alcohol, for instance, can serve as a temporary distraction, a way to numb painful emotions or memories.
Substances like drugs and alcohol do a good job of helping people conceal or postpone their pain, sadness or despair.
They take them away from unwanted feelings and into a state of unfeeling, which can help the person cope, but only in the short term.
Once the effects of the substance wear off, it can feel like a dam breaking inside you, and the surge of bad feelings comes rushing back, often with a vengeance.
Breaking the addiction cycle
The cycle of addiction can be broken when your loved one a) recognises these addictive patterns as coping mechanisms and not a sign they are broken or flawed and b) seeks help and support.
Your role in this process is crucial, and your support can make a significant difference in a loved one’s healing journey.
However, it’s worth repeating that you cannot force someone into recovery.
It’s a choice the individual has to make and theirs alone. Your role is to be the supporter and show your loved one you care and are there for them.
Resources for families
When it comes to supporting a loved one through addiction, particularly when childhood trauma is a leading factor, it can be helpful to have the right resources and information.
You may find the below helpful when understanding the role of childhood trauma in a loved one’s addiction and how best to support them (while also taking care of yourself).
Addiction often begins as a coping mechanism
Understanding that addiction usually starts as a coping mechanism can foster a deeper sense of empathy and compassion among family members, replacing self-blame and shame with a shared understanding of the struggle.
What began as a survival mechanism may have spiralled into dependency and then addiction.
When families view substance abuse through this lens, it can help reframe their understanding of addiction rather than seeing their loved one as self-destructive or broken.
For instance, they may see someone trying to cope in the only way they know how. This can help cultivate understanding and compassion over judgement and the need to fix the problem.
Early trauma changes the brain and stress response
Early trauma, also called adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), can significantly disrupt a child’s brain development.
Whether someone experienced physical or emotional abuse, witnessed domestic violence between their caregivers or grew up in a chaotic household, these experiences can disrupt the body’s natural stress system, making it harder to cope with emotional distress in adulthood.
These altered stress responses can put an individual at higher risk of mental health issues such as depression, anxiety, impulsivity, and problems with emotional regulation – symptoms that are precursors to substance use.
Trauma doesn’t disappear with time
The common misconception that ‘whatever happened in the past should stay in the past’ can be incredibly unhelpful, particularly when it comes to understanding the link between childhood trauma and addiction.
Trauma doesn’t fade with time.
Oftentimes, the opposite is true – painful experiences from the past can become stored in the body, causing a range of unpleasant symptoms like depression, anxiety, chronic pain, fatigue, unstable relationships and addictive behaviours.
This is where treatments such as EMDR can be helpful, as this type of therapy allows individuals to reprocess their trauma in a safe and empowering way through guided eye movements and other techniques.
EMDR uses various strategies, such as those mentioned above, to effectively store unprocessed memories and emotions that were not correctly processed during the original event.
This helps to reduce distress and address unhelpful coping mechanisms tied to these experiences.
EMDR is widely used in various clinical settings and is a highly effective treatment for those with co-occurring disorders like addiction and trauma.
There’s a distinct chance that your loved one may not consciously connect their past trauma to their current struggles with addiction.
However, unresolved emotions/pain are likely driving their behaviours in some way, experiences that were never fully addressed or processed.
Empathy is more healing than blame
Families commonly blame themselves for their loved one’s addiction – they may also experience guilt, anger or frustration when attempting to support their loved one.
These are all completely valid responses and show that you care.
However, shifting the focus from blame to compassion can be helpful.
One good way to do this is to take a trauma-informed approach to supporting your loved one.
For instance, instead of asking your loved one ‘what’s wrong with them,’ ask ‘what happened to them.’
This reframe can help you see beyond addiction and understand what lies beneath these behaviours, likely someone who may be carrying a lot of pain, sadness, and unhealed wounds from the past.
Support recovery with boundaries and compassion
It’s essential to remember that you matter, too.
Supporting your loved one through addiction doesn’t mean losing yourself or neglecting your needs in the process.
Setting clear, healthy boundaries is essential to your health and that of your loved one. You can let your loved one know you are there for them but will not enable harmful or upsetting behaviours.
Other ways you can support yourself include:
- Going to family therapy
- Attending support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous
- Speaking with a therapist one-on-one
- Practising self-care, which may include prioritising eating healthy, getting enough sleep, regular exercise, meditation, and stress management techniques like deep breathing or going for a walk
- Educating yourself – continuing to learn more about addiction and its impact on the brain.
How Camino Recovery can help
Addiction can affect anyone, regardless of background, age, or circumstance.
If you or someone close to you is facing challenges with substance use, support is within reach.
At Camino Recovery, we bring over sixteen years of experience guiding individuals and families through healing and lasting change.
Our compassionate team combines psychiatric, clinical, and medical expertise with various therapies, including evidence-based treatments, 12-step support, trauma-informed treatment, holistic wellness practices, family-focused care, and relapse prevention planning.
Remember – we’re here to walk alongside you and your loved one every step of the way.
When a loved one is struggling with addiction, it’s easy to feel anxious, afraid, or even heartbroken.
It’s also common to question your actions and feel responsible for your loved one’s addiction. You might wonder if something you said or did led them to alcohol and/or drugs.
Am I a bad parent, sibling, partner, or friend? Am I not doing enough to help, or am I doing too much?
While it’s natural to feel self-blame in these situations, seeking understanding is more productive.
By understanding the complexities of addiction, you can learn to support your loved one and yourself better.
Contact our multidisciplinary team today, who will gladly provide further information and support.
